Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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