dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
