Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Randomize
