in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
you will always have a special place in my vag
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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