and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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