We should be called the Road Head Warriors
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
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