We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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