marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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