So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I understand Curling. That high.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
