can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
