I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
