guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize