Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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