we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
