super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
