this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
