Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
