Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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