is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Randomize
