She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
wow bdsm is so cute
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