Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
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