Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Mom said you looked used
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
