I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I wear drunk well.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
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