better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
