You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Randomize