JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
