omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Randomize
