these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
