lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
