That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Randomize
