My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
