Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize