How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Randomize
