He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
