Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
