Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
