Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Will you blow on my dice?
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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