how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
