Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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