Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Come on in and take your pants off
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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