? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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