you turned your livingroom into a bong?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
