we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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