So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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