I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
