I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
