Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
did you just send me my own nude
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Randomize
