I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Randomize