Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
there is puke in my bra ... again
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
