Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
